It has been a long time since I last posted here. I missed blogging and I want to get back started up again with a quick little post about the fact that I got an iPad back in November. It was always something of a fetish object for me: and by that I mean that the object carried a lot more meaning than the thing itself. Obviously Apple is an expert in that realm, and their domination of the creative world’s accepted tools is pretty staggering. I felt it perhaps as a shortcut to being perceived as an artist. While I struggle to maintain a connection to that part of myself, and fight the feelings of failure of not being a full-time self-employed creator at the ripe age of 32, I think having this cool new piece of kit to play with has been really beneficial.
Here are some sad comics and a portrait of a furious young Bernadette Devlin to try to propel me forward with my work. I made these a long time ago now, back in winter!
There is a lot I like about this tablet, but I really do miss my desktop computer which died about a year ago. I’m typing on my ancient laptop at the minute because I find the combination of iPad / WordPress / Elementor really very buggy to work with!
I’ve been trying to be bold and make art again. I’m updating the website’s portfolio at the minute with work I’ve completed over the past year, which is feeling like an important step in building some positive self-regard. I’ve been going to regular comics-making meet ups, and even started going to life drawing again. Struggling against weighty low self esteem in this late-stage neocolonial capitalist hellscape makes creativity feel like a luxurious dirty burden there can’t really be time or attention for, but over and over I remember it is the main reason I can find for being alive. A way to connect and communicate. I want to be good at this.
I have still been having little plays with animation, too 🙂
Nothing huge, but I like these weird little attempts – one sketched nice idea and another attempt at learning to paint digitally, then getting bored and turning it into a moving picture. Classic distractible brain.
That’ll do for now. There is some actual drawing work I’m avoiding really spectacularly today so wish me luck as I get back to it.